Poop jokes and big tech’s data hunger aside, this seems to me one of the more useful applications of AI: Checking for early signs of medical problems.
I have Crohns. This would help monitor disease activity for sure. And having more data could help understand triggers better.
During covid, cities were testing the sewage to get an idea how many people had covid. We should have like a lever to tell the toilet who is shitting, and it could route the waste to a personal testing chamber.
We should have like a lever to tell the toilet who is shitting
Or just an extra upward facing camera.
Kids in 2050: “Everybody knows the myth that no two buttholes look alike is just an urban legend to convince you to reverse image search your butthole against the TOTO leak of 2034.”
…Uranus.
BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAHJCTJDYHVDHV!!!
I don’t want Big Tech having access to my sacred turd data
Can’t believe they’re making the smart pipe a reality https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=DJklHwoYgBQ
AI toilet is a registered sex offender
It’s distressing just how freaking similar the sales pitch is too.
What I’m loathed to even call the “real product”: It’s time to stop flushing away valuable data.
The fake one: If I had information that could save your life or the life of your family members, would you flush that?
Just… wow
When you finally become sentient only to discover your purpose is to compare logs of shit
Not just the big dookers. The green globbers and the brown bombers, too
Pretty much what AI already was doing on the internet.
No no. It’s regurgitating shit on the internet.
Okay, the toilet told me now I have a problem, but yet I still don’t have health care that I can afford. This short game fuckboy shit is just getting on my nerves. This is the dumbest country in the world, I swear to God.
Will the toilet refuse to flush without a subscription?
It’s out of magenta.
Weird. I see lots of red
The billions spent chasing these unicorns could be so much better used to lift communities out of poverty and give clean water and housing to thousands. Our priorities are fucked.
We already have the technology and resources for everyone to live in a post scarcity society.
But where are we supposed to find dirt-cheap labor if we eradicate poverty?! Won’t someone think of the shareholders?
And yet…
But everyone doesn’t want to live in a post-scarcity society. Lack of survival challenge leads to mental degradation.
I’m honestly surprised they use Bluetooth for profiles. I figured it would scan your asshole and use that as a biometric like your retina.
Isn’t that Smart Pipe?
Where all AIs belong.
Doing QA for this company must be the most unusual job.
“So, Greg, what do you do for work?”
“Uhhhh…. I’m the control group for AI toilets.”
"but it’s not all bad. They pay me to sit on the shitter a couple times a day and I only blacked out … once? twice! "
I actually interviewed for a data science role with this company a couple years ago. They were definitely cagey about what the actual product was for the initial screenings and then when they finally opened up about the role and …duties… of poop data scientist, it was actually pretty funny.
What if multiple people use the toilet? Does this device have some sort of poop-id?
Now these are the AI headlines I dreamed of so many years ago
Smart pipe?
They just need to find their own Scout Condor and they’ll have everyone checking the nitrates in their stool.
Smart pipe
Oh, and it’s also the only technology to be a registered sex offender.
