>sleeping nude, as usual
>wake up, sleep paralysis
>feel stroking against the side of my head, hear “there there, it’ll be fine…”
>feel imbued with power and RAGE
>suddenly no longer paralyzed
>LAUNCH myself out of bed, unmute computer, turn on screen
>Techno Rocker Rob Mayth Remix begins blasting at max volume, looping
>grab flamberge (picture of a glowing red sword being forged)
>run all through house, waving sword about while nude, flipping lights on
>roaring “COME OUT AND PLAY, MOTHERFUCKER”
>did this for an hour
>5:30AM by the time my rage dies down
>scream “FUUUUCK YEEEEAAAAAH” turn off lights, go to sleep
>no experiences since
also
>neighbor asks me what the fuck I was doing running around naked with a large sword last night >ask him why he was watching >he shuts up
“Why were you watching!?!”
“Because a screaming naked weird cunt with a sword at 5am is unusual you fucking autist”
Criticizing the crazy? That’s a flambergin’.
“Oh, is that your fetish? Pervert??”
I mean… yes, but I’d damn sure shut the hell up too. Probably while doing the awkward sideways shuffle towards the nearest exit.
ask him why he was watching
maybe he like what he see
Massive win for anon
This feels like it was funnier and more epic in his head than put out on text