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Godric@lemmy.world to Shirts That Go Hard@lemmy.world · 7 个月前

Damn that's quite the statement

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Damn that's quite the statement

lemmy.world

Godric@lemmy.world to Shirts That Go Hard@lemmy.world · 7 个月前
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  • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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    7 个月前

    Imagine being the guy at the novelty T-Shirt company, who takes requests.

    And then THIS order comes in…

    • Klear
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      7 个月前

      They probably make these in bulk.

      • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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        7 个月前

        …I honestly don’t know if that’s better or worse.

    • Godric@lemmy.worldOP
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      7 个月前

      That must be a day for thought, like what is going in in that man’s head?

  • BeigeAgenda@lemmy.ca
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    7 个月前

    Imagine a world where people just wear their dating profile on the back and then someone who fancy them says “I’m down for that, where’s your consent form?”.

    • Godric@lemmy.worldOP
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      7 个月前

      Incredibly based world, if it were so easy

      • lud@lemm.ee
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        7 个月前

        Sounds like bureaucracy that has gone a bit too far, lol

        I bet the Vogons would like it though.

        • flicker@lemmy.world
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          7 个月前

          Sounds like what does down at the federal sex bureau.

          • ggppjj@lemmy.world
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            7 个月前

            Reminded me of this sketch from A Bit of Fry and Laurie: https://youtu.be/DxFU_fIUawM

  • billwashere@lemmy.world
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    7 个月前

    This reads like a EULA

    • FenrirIII@lemmy.world
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      7 个月前

      More like a warning

  • Godric@lemmy.worldOP
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    7 个月前

    The longer you read it, the more bizzarely specific and funnier it gets

    • takeda@lemmy.world
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      7 个月前

      I wish I could read the whole thing.

      • Iheartcheese@lemmy.world
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        7 个月前

        I wish I could set him up on a blind date with a few people

        • jaybone@lemmy.world
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          7 个月前

          Do those people have badges?

    • corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca
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      7 个月前

      the more [bizarrely] specific and funnier

      Maybe that’s the joke? Are we all just not getting the humour? I watched The Office and kinda felt the same as I do now; maybe it’s more ‘cringe’ humour?

      • Godric@lemmy.worldOP
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        7 个月前

        That is indeed the joke

  • skozzii@lemmy.ca
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    7 个月前

    How were they able to catch a picture of him before he got swarmed by 17 and 18 year old blondes.

    • MentallyExhausted@reddthat.com
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      7 个月前

      He probably not in Illinois, so that cuts a lot out.

  • Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world
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    7 个月前

    Terrifyingly specific.

    • Godric@lemmy.worldOP
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      7 个月前

      Hilariously specific!

    • phorq@lemmy.ml
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      Yeah, not sure who the ad is for, but they must’ve paid a lot of money for space on that dude’s back.

  • USSMojave@startrek.website
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    7 个月前

    Someone needs to put this text into a Star Wars style opening crawl

    • Mandy
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      deleted by creator

      • chiliedogg@lemmy.world
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        7 个月前

        Just realized you couldn’t copy/paste for the prompt and had to type that out…

        • Mandy
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          deleted by creator

          • MathiasTCK@lemmy.world
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            7 个月前

            I recommend one of these options:

            Mind Blank attempts to hide the mind from attack, making its parts unidentifiable.

            Thought Shield cloaks the mind so as to hide first one part, then another. This defense can be kept up at all times, unlike the others.

            Mental Barrier is a carefully built thought repetition wall which exposes only that small area.

            Intellect Fortress is a defense which calls forth the powers of the ego and super-ego to stop attacks.

            Tower of Iron Will relies only upon the super-ego to build an unassailable haven for the brain.

            • Mandy
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              deleted by creator

              • MathiasTCK@lemmy.world
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                7 个月前

                I know only the empirical clarity of Imperial Truth.

                A man’s soul needs to be a fortress.

                • Mandy
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                  deleted by creator

    • Dicska@lemmy.world
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      7 个月前

      And print the scrolling text on a shirt like a gif.

  • Zozano@lemy.lol
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    7 个月前

    Lawful evil

  • thanks_shakey_snake@lemmy.ca
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    7 个月前

    It’s nice for him to be inclusive of 18! year olds. Dating can be difficult for ladies in their mid-quadrillions.

  • taiyang@lemmy.world
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    7 个月前

    It’s like the intro text scroll to a Star Wars movie…

    • massive_bereavement@fedia.io
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      7 个月前

      IT’S A TIME OF STRIFE FOR THE REPUBLIC MEANWHILE IF YOU’RE A BLONDE OF 17 OR 18 YEARS OLD, WHICH IS…

  • dwindling7373@feddit.it
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    7 个月前

    Seeing this in the wild my first thought would be that he lost some kind of bet or has been challenged into wearing this in a crowded place.

    • Godric@lemmy.worldOP
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      7 个月前

      You have good first thoughts!

  • baggachipz
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    7 个月前

    4chan irl

    • Uriel238 [all pronouns]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      7 个月前

      OG Craigslist M4W

  • blackstampede
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    7 个月前

    The man has a type, and that type is either 17 or 6402373705728000 years old.

  • RacerX@lemm.ee
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    All of that text and he didn’t specify what gender he’s looking for.

    • Sneezycat@sopuli.xyz
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      Technically, blondes implies women; if it was non-women it’d be blonds

      • Cataphract@lemmy.ml
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        7 个月前

        well shit, TIL

      • RacerX@lemm.ee
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        7 个月前

        Had no idea. Thank you for the knowledge!

    • DerArzt@lemmy.world
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      7 个月前

      Blond boys doing what blond boys do

  • Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world
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    7 个月前

    There must be easier less public ways to declare yourself a permanent virgin.

    • OpenStars@discuss.online
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      On the other hand, what better way for a parent to ensure that their precious little guy remains one? 😜

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