(bonus points if it’s being used for official business purposes)
A works/construction department in a medium-sized town. They had an Excel spreadsheet that had a HUGE number of screens. Anyone wanting to do commercial real-estate construction had to not only fill out these forms, but keep them uptodate and submit the updates at end of each work day.
The thing was HUGE and had lots of interdependent screens, where if you picked an item from a dropdown menu, it unlocked a bunch of other complicated screens or panels, and so forth. Each screen had 30-40 items and fields on it, and there were multiple dozens of screens you had to tab through.
To run it on the jobsite, construction contractors HAD to buy a pen and touchscreen Windows ‘tablet’ ($$$). The whole thing had been written and maintained by one guy over the course of a few years.
EVERYONE hated it. The guy who had written it wanted to get promoted to management, but nobody else wanted to maintain it so he was stuck.
A Google Sheet used as a password manager that every employee had access to. To keep it “secure” the cells with the passwords were hidden by changing the background color to match the text color.
Holy crap
Lmao. I once had a senior dev put database passwords into documentation, and then was about to email those out to interview candidates with the passwords ‘blacked’ out. I caught it quick enough before it could be sent thankfully.
Yeouch. How long ago was this? It feels like the standards for even junior devs have gone way up.
…but I guess even the C-students must find jobs eventually…?
2024 lol. Maybe senior dev is an overstatement, he was just more senior than me. He also left a database where the main table had one varchar, freetext column that users wrote multiple fields into because it was a ‘simpler user experience’ . Was a pain to extract all those fields with regex…
Oh dear…
I don’t even understand how that would get past even the first couple of people using it. I imagine the idea was that they’d copy/paste the value into the password field. But did nobody ever paste the password into somewhere other than a password field and realize, “Hey, I can see this password!”…even accidentally?
Someone posted this last year… It still blows my mind.
OP asked for the worst thing you’ve seen Excel used for…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UBX2QQHlQ_I
Matt Parker uses Excel to demonstrate how subpixels/images are generated.
Let me blow your mind a bit more…
That whole video was needlessly upbeat paired with the mildly depressing things he was saying.
You know those Give Aid charity pleas you see on TV with the sad music? Imagine that but with upbeat techno music instead
The dude was too cheap to buy paint and brushes, to do what he loves. It kind of is a comical tragedy
I remember a story my dad told me about a guy at his work who didn’t really know how to use Excel, and so had dragged the cell and column spacing out in order to have one huge cell, in which he typed all of his calculations - which he did manually with a calculator before typing them all longhand into his giant cell 😁
Creative solution
Creative solution
I’m still trying to figure out what he was trying to solve, lmao
No idea - all I remember is my dad almost crying with laughter as he told me about it 😁
Ahaha, what was he even trying to do? What was the purpose of that Excel sheet?
In two different companies I’ve seen people refer to “the database” when they actually mean a spreadsheet. That’s not just a terminology mixup, these things were super complex, with pseudo-relational tables, lookups, links to other files etc. The sort of thing that should be in an actual database, that has less chance of breaking in obscure ways when someone inserts a row or types a value over a formula. It was actually pretty impressive, in an “impending doom at any moment” kind of way.
Also had one where there was a spreadsheet of everyone in the business top to bottom, shared by HR and IT. Both groups needed a list of staff, so why not just keep one, right? This thing had personal details like home address and medical conditions, plus things like salary (inc garnishments), performance management notes etc, as well as of course their username and password (which was assigned to them and they couldn’t change) and security questions and answers. It didn’t even have a password on the file. I noped tf out of that place as quickly as I could, but for reasons even worse than that stupid spreadsheet.
That sounds like watching people play Jenga with railroad ties.
Company schedule entirely written in Google Sheets. When I originally took the position over, the owner wouldn’t settle for an alternative solution.
The previous IT person worked there previously for about 10 years and had been compulsively adding features with AppScript the entire time. It was auto sending emails, handling inventory, maintaining project files, you name it. I briefly looked at how it worked and there were easily a dozen script files, a few of which were thousands of lines.
I was able to replicate most of the important parts of the system that he wanted to replicate in about two weeks in between other work with one script file and something like 50 lines.
I eventually left for reasons unrelated to the place and only ever had to fix issues once every 6 months or so, which I consider pretty decent for an unattended Google Sheet shared by 5 users.
I’ve since returned and rebuilt the schedule a second time with a proper database and the whole thing run 10x smoother and more reliably.
My company uses excel for costing proposals (not crazy). In order to accurately cost, they decided to include everyone’s salaries. I was all for it because the transparency helps keep everyone fairly compensated, but some were less enthused. Sadly gone now.
LMAO
I love the transparency, but yikes.
I bet someone said “We can protect this information by making the text of the salaries white!”
Thats more work than it’s worth. Just black out the cells instead.
Company-internal service where the users would write their desired configuration into an Excel file. Then they push that into a Git repo, which triggers a deployment of the service with the configuration read from all the Excel files.
i was unfortunately responsible for this one…
we developed a wireless communication protocol which was specified in an excel sheet, and it fell on us devs to implement the message types specified in the sheet. however since the specification kept changing we had to constantly update the message types in our tests to make sure they conformed. so i said “fuck it” and built a program that allowed me to “import” an excel file in a python program, which exposed all messages as classes that could be instantiated with automatic unit conversions. just drop the excel file of the day in the right place and run the test suite.
anyway that’s how the excel sheet became the formal API definition
Creative solutions…
To send images for graphic design.
Lmao…
The client needs it as a table. Excel does tables, so this is the best way.
Maybe they even locked the cells to prevent downloading the images (but not screenshots lol)? (I’m trying to be generous here)
An oil company which had an MS access DB and a form configured for it with no checks for formatting that would insert the fields of the form directly into the database, and then if they wanted to make a change, they would export the entire database as csv, open it in excel, make changes and use that to overwrite the entire database.
This had been going on since some time in the 1990’s. They finally wanted to move to a modernized databasing/operations solution which is what my company does.
I successfully cleaned 75% of that data, however it took 37 regular expressions and a script that was about 800 lines to account for every possible mis-entry, incorrect format, and merging fields if they were empty from newest records to oldest records until the fields were no longer empty where possible (essentially collapsing the records together to get as much data on each unique object which may have had N records over time through the database).
It is UN-BELIEVABLE what actual businesses get away with.
Someone once commented about a regional ISP with a customer base about five figures in size. Did they use a database system to track customer billing? Nope. All the customers and their billing info are on one spreadsheet. Billing customers means manually crawling through the spreadsheet and typing up the bill.
is this a UK isp?
A CRM for a large client. A VERY large client.
Gantt Chart
Oh lord, it’s hilarious that when I searched ‘Gantt Chart’ to learn what it was, the second or third link was to excel templates for it.
Ahem In my defense, the way I did it wasn’t totally terrible. The dates are all gathered from other sheets, the chart is generated automatically with conditional formatting, and it’s locked so there’s no moving of cells or changing the colour manually. Don’t hate me.
Judgment is God’s purview. I just arrange the meeting.
Honestly, if it worked well for you and all the other affected stakeholders, I think that’s what matters most.
Ouch. If there were some lovely formulas that could move things around automatically, I could see that working…but I bet people were literally dragging around cells one at a time.
Look, when I paste, it gives me the option to Move Cells to the Right!
I admire your faith in the goodness of people. No, it went in the other direction: editing VBASIC in the developer options and all the horrors that brings. Obviously, that’s too easy to break. So it was locked down. So, of course, people started making copies so they could make it do the things they wanted that it wasn’t supposed to do. It seemed like by the end, each person probably had their own, slightly different copy with degrees of functionality depending on their Excel skills. Not a great environment for making a baseline and a critical path. Do not recommend.
Not exactly what you’re looking for, but how about a flight simulator?
The Excel wizards always impress me.
But now I want to see what happens when the equivalent of a caveman finds a magic artifact and creates some sort of precarious magic monkey paw solution, haha