• sanpedropeddler
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    4 hours ago

    Gross to me that multiple comments here are ignoring this reality. Crimes committed by men against women in situations like that are so common that women aren’t protecting themselves unless they consider every unfamiliar man a potential threat.

    Obviously women can also commit crimes against men, but its so much less common that I don’t have to take precautions to protect myself against them.

    As a man it kind of sucks when you are assumed to be dangerous even when you aren’t, but you need to get over it. Its not worth it for women to compromise their safety, and assume you to not be a threat just to make you feel better.

    • spujb@lemmy.cafe
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      14 minutes ago

      you dont need my validation but here it is anyway, thanks for being cool and normal about things so serious as this :)

    • ryathal
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      2 hours ago

      Crimes committed by random strangers against women are practically non-existent. Women absolutely need to fear their creepy neighbors or angry ex, as people they know are the actual risks.

    • The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.worldOPM
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      4 hours ago

      Obviously women can also commit crimes against men, but its so much less common that I don’t have to take precautions to protect myself against them.

      Yeah, I’ve never had second-thoughts about walking past some dangerous-looking women or checking over my shoulder to make sure some woman isn’t following me home. This is a regular thing that women deal with, and pretending that the experiences are anywhere close to equivalent is odd.

      • Obinice@lemmy.world
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        46 minutes ago

        You don’t live in a very dangerous area, then.

        I keep an eye on everyone, even a woman with a kid in a pram (assuming the pram isn’t just an empty decoy) could try to mug you, people get desperate and chavs get violent. Always keep your head on a swivel, don’t trust anyone at face value just because of their gender or what they look like.

      • SchmidtGenetics@lemmy.world
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        3 hours ago

        It’s dark and night, how can you tell gender?

        People are afraid of anything in these situations, but they justify it by using men as an excuse, even though, you wouldn’t tell it’s man or women, until it’s too late anyways….

        • flicker@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          1 hour ago

          It is not an “excuse.” If I’m attacked by a man at night, I will have a more difficult time protecting myself than if a man was attacked at night, on average. Not to mention that you have to ask yourself, what is the attacker after? Because being sexually assaulted or raped is so personal and awful that it’s natural to have a higher amount of fear of that outcome.

          Like how if you were equally likely of being jumped at night by a stranger as you were of being abducted and having spiky metal spears shoved in your urethra… you might recognize that’s it’s not super likely you’ll get jumped, but you would be way less likely to risk it since the fact that sounding is just too awful to chance (for the vast majority of the population).

          Also… my sample size is too small to be statistically relevant, but 100% of the men I know are sure they could “take” a random female attacker.

          Unrelated; asking that question was difficult but not for the reason I expected. It was like a game! “Do I have super powers in this scenario?” “Is she armed? Am I armed?” “How much time do I have to prepare?” And my personal favorite, from a particularly well-traveled friend- “Is she like a random person, or one of my exes?”

        • 1984@lemmy.today
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          3 hours ago

          I can easily see if it’s a women or a man just based on how they move from a distance.

          I guess it depends on how dark it is. If it’s pitch black, nobody can see, but usually you have some shape you can see.

    • Psionicsickness@reddthat.com
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      3 hours ago

      As a man it kind of sucks when you are assumed to be dangerous

      Sorry I didn’t assume you were a pussy. My mistake.

    • argon@lemmy.today
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      3 hours ago

      Women are murdered less often than men. It’s simply irrational for women to be more afraid of being murdered than men are.

      • 1984@lemmy.today
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        3 hours ago

        Haha… You may be right about how often it happens, but no woman is going to feel safe because it rarely happens. Women can get kidnapped or beaten up or raped too… It’s not a safe world.

        It’s not a safe world for guys either but at least we are built to take a few punches without breaking an arm.