I have a lot of runners up, like Amrito for Amy, or Bradinglesmirch for Briar, but I think the dumbest has to be Scott Von Scott of the Scottsdale Scotts Who Did Scott So Scottily in the Battle of Scotteen Twelve.

So I ask you, what’s the stupidest thing you’ve ever called your furry friends?

  • _thisdot
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    385 months ago

    I live in Bangalore, India. The local language here is Kannada but I don’t speak it nor do I have many friends who speak it. I named my cat Bacardi and would call him Bacoo. Turns out the word for cat in the local language is also “Bacoo”. So for any local who saw me interact with my cat, it looked like I was calling my cat “cat”! I found out around a year later!

  • Ada
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    255 months ago

    Does “Shithead” count? That’s what I call my cat :P

  • @[email protected]
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    235 months ago

    My sister had a lot of cats. We stopped being clever naming them, they got names like “Orange Short Hair”, etc.

    Except this one cat that otherwise looked like 2 others, except it had these amazing tufts of hair coming out of its ears, so we named him Ears. Then we found out he was deaf… but we had already named him Ears, so it stuck.

    • @[email protected]
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      175 months ago

      I’d argue that Ears is even better knowing he’s deaf. And what does he care, he can’t hear you anyway.

  • Rhynoplaz
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    235 months ago

    When my cats Porkchop and Applesauce get in trouble, they are called by their full names, Applewood Smoked Sausage and Porkus Von Chopp Chopp.

  • @[email protected]
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    5 months ago

    I call my cat turtle-butt.

    There is no reason, when anyone asks why, I just say “her butt is made of turtle.”

  • @[email protected]
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    135 months ago

    We had a lovely cat when I grew up, she was completely black, with short but compact fur, and tuffs on her ears.

    For this to make sense, I need to talk about Swedish grammar…

    In Swedish grammar we have two genus for words:

    “Utrum” words get the suffix “(e)n” in their definitive form.

    “Neutrum” words get the suffix “(e)t” in their definite form.

    These words also get the en/ett article in front of it when talking about a signular unspecified item.

    Example:

    Car - bil, a car - en bil, the car - bilen

    Table - bord, a table - ett bord, the table - bordet

    Now, the Swedish word for cat is an utrum word:

    Katt, en katt, katten.

    One of the nicknames we used to call our cat was the neutrum defined form: “kattet”.

    Which if I am looking back at this comment is a funny nickname, with a stupidly complex explanation to non Swedish speakers.

  • SendPicsofSandwiches
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    115 months ago

    “The Wuh” her actual name was diamond, but my brother one day just called her “Diamond Wuh” and it stuck. After that everything we called her was also a variation of wuh

  • @[email protected]
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    115 months ago

    My dog has hair loss problems and the base of her tail is bare. There’s a big wrinkle in her skin there so she’s Wrinklebutt and my other dog by default is Fuzzybutt

  • @[email protected]
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    105 months ago

    Lucy & Ethel. Originally there were two stray orange tabby kittens, but since my grandmother let them out to run around, one day only one came back home. Not knowing which was which, that cat became Lucy & Ethel, who proceeded to outlive my grandmother and one of her kids.

  • Zammy95
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    95 months ago

    Growing up we had a cat named Remi, I would tell people his full name was Sir Remi Remington Remingston III. My mom hated it. I miss that cat, he was great

    • @[email protected]
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      45 months ago

      My parents have a Remy whose full name is Rembrandt. I call him Rumball. His has two siblings called Frida and Diego but surprisingly none of them are very good painters.

  • @[email protected]
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    95 months ago

    I have some kinda mutt who was abandoned by his owner (he was microchipped and we reached out saying we had him and they answered back telling us what a good dog he is and how much joy he’ll bring us 🙄)

    His original name was Kobe, but neither my husband nor I are basketball fans, so I changed it to “Korbie”, as short for Korbel, my favorite cheap fake champagne.

    Anyhow, he now gets referred to as “Korbie Porgie Pudding and Pie” or “Korbelicious” (Sung to the tune of “Fergielicious” of course!)

    • @[email protected]
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      65 months ago

      The twist is that his original owners didn’t know jack shit about basketball, but were really into a specific strain of beef

  • Beamrunner_Ka-tet
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    85 months ago

    I have a Dibo/Bluenose mix. We call her “Fat Fat”. She is like 85+lbs of pure love.

  • @[email protected]
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    85 months ago

    Kitty. My cat’s name is entirely different but the little asshole, after 15 years, still responds best to “Kitty”. Fucker.