• ditty
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      3 months ago

      He looks like he’s 55 but used a face filter to conceal gin blossoms

    • @[email protected]
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      3 months ago

      What? He looks 85. I doubt he’s real with a name like Dick Strocher, but if that picture is real, I feel bad for the guy.

    • Kaity
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      3 months ago

      I resent that, I’m 30 and I look at least half his age

    • cobysev
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      23 months ago

      As someone who is about to turn 40, I personally thought he looked more like 59.

  • Maple Engineer
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    893 months ago

    If you have to tell people you’re an alpha male, you’re not.

    This guy is definitely not.

    • FuglyDuck
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      323 months ago

      It also says “I’m poorly educated”. in the wild, wolf packs are mostly families- a breeding pair and the kids that haven’t left on their own yet.

        • FuglyDuck
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          3 months ago

          yup.

          the Alpha/Beta/whatever pecking order thing was established from observations of captive wolves in packs that were forced. it has more in common with the dominance heirarchy of prison culture among humans than it does with wolves being wolves in nature.

          • @[email protected]
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            33 months ago

            The dude who did the study even said it was wrong and a bad study to apply to wolves.

            Imagine if an anthropologist said: this is a paper on normal human behavior.

            And then the first line is: to get an accurate representation of a population, I went to Rykers Island.

      • @Scubus
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        13 months ago

        pro-Trump

        I mean he told you he’s uneducated, what more do you want?

  • @[email protected]
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    733 months ago

    18

    Wildly successful

    About to bust out my stellar SAT scores and bag some incredible Trad Wife pussy

    • Cethin
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      413 months ago

      In the US, and basically everywhere else, being born into the right family is 95% of what makes someone “wildly successful”, so I’m not sure that’s totally wrong. He just didn’t have to earn it like he should have to.

      • Cosmo
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        153 months ago

        Ya p much. At 18 isn’t really enough time to really earn success. You have to have been incredibly lucky in one way or another.

        Or, more likely on this case, I’d guess moderately successful with help, and on the wrong side of the dunning-kruger to realize what “wild success” even is

  • @[email protected]
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    3 months ago

    In the mirror universe, in 1952, a young Fred Willard was walking through a chemical plant when he fell into a vat of preservation fluids. Instead of drowning him, the fluids embalmed him alive, making him ageless, immortal… and evil. 72 years later, having mastered the art of crossing between realities, he now stalks our world, neither dead nor alive, seeking carnal pleasures and absolute power. He is… THE ALPHA MALE.

    Coming to theatres this fall!

    • @[email protected]
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      163 months ago

      Or a fellon, seeing how the whole alpha wolf BS these guys base themselves on turned out to not exist in nature. That behaviour only exists in captivity.

  • @[email protected]
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    513 months ago

    At this point I’m suspecting every single one man who feel the need to write “Alpha Male” in his resumé to be gay with daddy issues.

      • @[email protected]
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        13 months ago

        Most of young boys are fine and innocent.

        But I guess that saying « he’s an alpha male » instead of « he has way too many problems to solve before being able to come out » would be funnier and accurate.

  • @BigDanishGuy
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    Oh shit, the young Jimmy Carr mannequin at Madame Tussaud’s came alive and is now a real little boy.

    On a side note, I couldn’t remember Jimmy Carr’s name, but googling “brittish standup annoying laugh” returned Jimmy Carr in the first result. I wonder what would happen if you googled “ventriloquist dummy turned standup comic most likely to be into snuff porn”

    Update: it doesn’t return Jimmy Carr, and don’t google yourself :(

    • @[email protected]
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      103 months ago

      Well I mostly have As on my report card and I could have played lacrosse but I was too busy.

    • @Apytele
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      3 months ago

      There’s a few very specific fields that peak at or around 18 and the list is basically certain sports, ballet, and sex work. Also this person looks like Edward Cullen but 10 years old.

    • @[email protected]
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      13 months ago

      Depends what you call wildly succesful. If you got straight A trough all classes until you’re 18, or you already have your own business and it actually makes money, I would call that wild success

    • Captain Aggravated
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      -73 months ago

      On my 18th birthday, I had a college scholarship, a job in an auto repair shop, a pilot’s license, and I owned a new pickup and a new motorcycle. I had a girlfriend who looked like Joan Jett if she had grown up listening to Green Day instead of AC/DC. And I didn’t look like the tendon sticking out of a chicken tender crossed with a 14th term senator. I was pretty successful for an 18 year old.

      • @[email protected]
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        53 months ago

        a job in an auto repair shop, a pilot’s license, and I owned a new pickup and a new motorcycle

        All totally paid for by said job.

        • Lemmy
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          3 months ago

          They could’ve gotten it from trade school for free, some high schools offer it for no price. I’m 19 years old and I’m making $30/hour working in IT. I didn’t go to tech school for computer networking though, I originally went for auto motive. I got my CompTIA A+ certification, and I also have my own electronics store on eBay where I sell Libreboot computers and other hardware (routers, switches, etc.).

    • @[email protected]
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      193 months ago

      So he ain’t real? That’s good, now I don’t have to feel sorry for this guy looking like that.

      • @[email protected]
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        3 months ago

        Fake name, but a real white nationalist running the account and, shockingly, talking about real Secret Jewish Tunnels that he probably wasn’t actually involved with but are hilarious.