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sag@lemm.ee to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 7 months ago

Protect Your Dick Data

hexbear.net

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  • cross-posted to:
  • [email protected]
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Protect Your Dick Data

hexbear.net

sag@lemm.ee to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 7 months ago
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58
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  • cross-posted to:
  • [email protected]

cross-posted from: https://hexbear.net/post/3669136

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  • Makeshift
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    7 months ago

    Genuinely though, it would not surprise anymore. We have subscription based cars selling your info to insurance companies, retroactively ammended purchase experiences everywhere, and every dang app and website harvesting as much info on you as physically possible no matter how mundane.

    Dick info reporting toilets would not at all catch me by surprise at this point.

    • RogueBanana@lemmy.zip
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      7 months ago

      Dick info reporting seems pointless but they can add an advert screen above the urinal (which is sadly becoming common) and track your eye movement to record engagement rates.

    • jama211@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      It’s just an auto flusher…

      • Makeshift
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        7 months ago

        Yes I’m aware. I’m saying that IF it were an actual thing, it would not be surprising at all considering the extent of invasive, non-consentual data collection and selling that happens all over the place these days.

        • Log in | Sign up@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          You’re right, yes, in many ways, but yet also very, very wrong.

  • socialpankakemix@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    7 months ago

    this is why I exclusively pee in the dumpster being dairy queen

    • RattlerSix@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      A real man would do it in the trash can inside the dairy queen

      • socialpankakemix@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        7 months ago

        good thing I’m not a man

        • RattlerSix@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          Sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed

      • Agent641@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        It was full

        • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          The dairy queen or the trash can

      • idunnololz@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        I pee on the dairy queen (with consent of course)

    • Scubus
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      7 months ago

      Why is the dumpster being dairy queen?

      • slackassassin
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        7 months ago

        Dumpster is obviously a dairy king.

    • Jessica@discuss.tchncs.de
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      7 months ago

      Don’t fast food restaurants usually have a camera pointed at their dumpster? XD

    • HootinNHollerin@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      I find the Whataburger dumpsters are more roomy

  • Zozano@lemy.lol
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    7 months ago

    il_1588xN.1998833855_27ng-4090175647

    That’s why I invest in wireless, RFID resistant, anti-flash dick screening devices. Wake up sheeple!

    • lud@lemm.ee
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      7 months ago

      But does it need to be tamper proof as well?

      • Zozano@lemy.lol
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        7 months ago

        Its not just tamper proof, it’s future proof!

        One day they’ll want to manually inspect your cock before getting on a plane.

        Well I’m sorry Mr. TSA, my WMD is none of your business.

        • mojofrododojo@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          WMD

          wonton micro dick?

  • mumblerfish@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Damn. They are automating penis inspection day? What are creeps to do now?

    • saruwatarikooji@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      We’re suffering… How do you expect me to feed my family when I have to compete with HAL here?

    • BoxOfFeet@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Automation stealing our jobs again. My grandpa was a penis inspector. He worked long, hard hours to put three kids through school and food on the table.

  • Avg@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    Good luck, I encrypted my dick data.

  • MrGerrit@feddit.nl
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    7 months ago

    "No data collected, subject not big enough to register. "

    • trumpetmouth@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      glad I’m not alone here.

  • niktemadur@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Dick pics or it didn’t happen!

  • IMNOTCRAZYINSTITUTION@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    real shit, these things are mechanical turks. they really are cameras that are live streaming to centers in third world countries. when the poorly paid operator sees you’re done, he sends the flush signal to the toilet. if you’ve ever been in a bathroom where the “sensor is broken” and it seems to flush at random, it’s because they just keep flushing it periodically if they can’t get a visual. real truth

    • werefreeatlast@lemmy.worldBanned
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      7 months ago

      We were just training AI flushers this whole time?

  • tpihkal@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    What does matter is length times diameter plus weight over girth divided by angle of the tip squared.

    • Log in | Sign up@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      I have so many questions. Are you measuring angle from the vertical or the horizontal? Whereabouts should I be placing the ruler for that tangent? Are we using metric or imperial units? If metric, is it square centimetres or kilograms per cm, and if it’s imperial, is it square inches or ounces per inch per square degree?

  • Blackout@fedia.io
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    7 months ago

    34x28x16 @ 400 p.s.i. is that enough information for you?

    • Capt. Wolf@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Sorry, but no, you forgot duration it took to void, stream color, taste, smell, accuracy, flow consistency, body hair grooming, presence and degree of curvature, and overall hygiene. We’ve gone ahead and shared your supplied data with our 1869 advertising and heathcare partners. Thank you for opting in! We will continue to collect data at all of our established locations and now through your personal cell phone! Have a nice day!

    • skulblaka
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      7 months ago

      400 psi? Damn you could piss the paint off your house with that thing

    • Log in | Sign up@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      At 400 pixels per square inch, 34x28x16 isn’t measurements I would have shared on lemmy.

  • GreenKnight23@lemmy.world
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    deleted by creator

    • kamen@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      All is fine, but I’m still curious: how many do you have?

      • GreenKnight23@lemmy.world
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        deleted by creator

  • chiliedogg@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Jokes on them. They’re gonna need a longer lens.

    • Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee
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      7 months ago

      (awkwardly long zooming noises)

  • Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    My pp information is public, Im not hiding anything - what are you people hiding??

  • YakTrimmer@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    7 months ago

    I care a lot about my prickvacy!

  • 🇸‌🇵‌🇪‌🇨‌🇺‌🇱‌🇦‌🇹‌🇪‌🇷‌@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    LMAO, jokes on them not going to be able to see mine without a microscope.

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