• JasonDJ@lemmy.zip
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    1 day ago

    My kid probably got pretty close to that number. He’s fine.

    Good kid. He’s got my wife’s eyes and my eating disorder.

  • BudgetBandit
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    2 days ago

    Actually, there is only 1 Santa who gets cloned into every Santa believing household on earth. But this clone has a deadly allergy to milk. The body gets removed by an elf afterwards.

  • Sabre363
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    2 days ago

    That doesn’t seem like that many cookies. Assuming an average of three cookies per household, that’s only ~100 million houses visted. Santa is either racist or he’s being paid off by the elven mafia to exclusively visit certain homes, only logical explanation for the discrepancy in the cookie consumption to global household ratio.

  • Colour_me_triggered@lemm.ee
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    2 days ago

    My friend, Santa eats mince pies and sherry in Britain. A few cookies on the other side of the moat barely soaks up the alcohol.

  • huquad@lemmy.ml
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    2 days ago

    I need sleep. I read this as three numbers in an array and was curious why Santa split them over three days.

    • LifeOfChance@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      The alternative is they include the whole world then it’s “not everybody celebrates christmas!!” It’s a lose/lose situation. It’s so easy to be upset and take things to serious. Lighten up enjoy the joke and move on. It’s not that deep. People aren’t gonna sit down and analyze the probable statics of who does and who does not celebrate then make a meme.

    • explodicle
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      1 day ago

      There is absolutely no way that many Americans are on the Nice List.