I have nipples Greg, can you milk me?

When in Rome do as the Romans do, and I do particularly love making hilariously taboo statements that mirror more conventionally acceptable fallacies. In early college I wrote an abortion focused “Modest Proposal” suggesting that men be forced to donate anatomical gifts (blood, skin, organs, etc) to their progeny to equalize the physical labor of men and women in procreation. The increased gravity of such a gift is balanced by the lower liklihood of its necessity (it might in many cases be harder on the body, but the odds a child will need it are much lower). I came at it from every angle and took each part of the argument to its most exaggeratedly ridiculous extent; Swift would’ve been proud. I’ve since lost the text, however.

I’m hard, argue with me

What god may call a bug, we call a feature.

How I do love that sweet, sweet expendable income.

In fact I strive to do as little as possible. I only work to pay the bills. If I could luck upon a comfortable enough nest egg I would quit working immediately and just play games the rest of my life (video & board, solo and with friends/family).

Hell, I may end up contributing more to society that way since I enjoy dabbling in video game design but don’t have enough time to actually work towards anything I could release. If I had time, maybe I’d actually create something for a wider audience rather than whatever minor contribution I have at work.

Well, one thing you should do in life is read the text you’ve written and checking for errors.

Amen

But look at how small and dexterous the children are, able to squeeze and clamber through the tunnels. And look at what they play all day: Minecraft. Clearly the children are best suited, as they yearn for the mines.

And yet it’s the children who yearn for the mines.

Thank you for your service

I can only hit myself in the face real hard three, four times before I get woozy and forget where I am. It’s a cycle of violence

I was talking about romanian men, not american ones

Fuck off with the baiting.

I would find a menstaurant (nice!) very sexist. I would eat all sexes without discrimination. As long as raised organic and free-range.

… menstaurant.

Of note, this is a different kind of business from a menstruant.

If it’s good enough, you might even eventually earn a Menchalin Star for quality!

I like the way I put it. Way easier to put on a bumper sticker.

Female presenting profile pic, we don’t actually know anything about the human who typed it

If you look her up you will see that this is one of her more tame takes unfortunately. At least this is not about her views on women’s place in marriage or the rights a husband supposedly has to their wives body, regardless of consent. I can’t help but feel a little sad for her though. From her recounting of her life it sounds like she married a man she didn’t love because that’s what she was supposed to do. After over a decade of miserable marriage she broke and saw it as her duty to be servile in all things to a man she was never really attracted to and convinced herself that happiness is to live that submissive life in deference to a man in all things. If it was the story of someone who got out and found a life outside those oppressive beliefs it would be a cautionary tale, but she sees it as the recipe for a good biblical life.

No, it makes it zero disgusting. It’s a person making a passionate calling. She simply calls for others to follow their steps, she’s a woman and a mother, and believes everything she says, and is probably happy and fulfilled and is wishing that to others.

You seem to be triggered af by literally everything and can’t see when someone’s heart is in the right place regardless of whether you agree with them or not.

Maybe that snowflake term your older generation used was correct. Cuz, frankly, you guys act like a bunch of rebellious teenagers. Kinda cringe.

Oh, I’m an atheist, feminist, child-free, I don’t have a tweeter, and where I live abortions are legal. And you’re cringe even to me.

Hands are fragile, they were created to hold tools. Like a stone. Stones are for hitting, not your poor fragile hands.

If you use a stone, you can still play the piano or paint your favorite landscape afterwards.

Kicking is our natural unarmed attack. Still a last resort compared to throwing rocks or whacking with sticks though. We evolved from ancestors who already used tools to defend themselves.

If you look at how Gorillas kind of walk around on their fists, it definitely makes sense that there’s some evolutionary benefit to the knuckle shape. It doesn’t have to be related to hitting things either. It’s easiest to support yourself with a straight wrist, like if you’re holding a branch, vs putting your palm flat is a lot more stress on your wrist.

Drag has fingers that are just the right size to shove up a huge cloaca. Does this mean drag was created for the purpose of giving handjobs to dragons? Yes, yes it does. And drag is happy with drag’s purpose.

I think they’re advocating that women can choose for themselves what kind of person to be, and the fact their bodies are capable of gestating new humans doesn’t obligate them to do so.

It’s sort of like how the fact a man’s body may be capable of entertaining others by dressing their penis up in a tiny coat and hat doesn’t mean we should bully an entire gender into making that the purpose of their existence, nor does it mean we’re advocating for a world without sharp dressed dicks.

Let people live their lives based on who they are, not the abilities of their genitals.

What exactly did they say that made you draw this conclusion? I’m so curious

Just FYI, my wife has two masters degrees and still was able to get pregnant, give birth and help raise a child with me afterward. So apparently it is possible for women to have advanced university degrees and have kids.

Incidentally, my mother also has two masters degrees, so apparently that was also possible in the 1970s without the population crashing.